I have been wanting to write this for a while, I feel like I need to talk about how detrimental my attitude was in the last couple of months, it seems silly to talk about it knowing how others are guilty of this same thing for just hyping up, responding to a criticism/nitpick/gripe of something, but it isn’t, because I kept making the same mistake every time, even though the lesson was to be learned the first time, I’m guilty.
This post is directed at the ones that I have talked to on Twitter and Discord, even people who I have apologized or did not apologize to, however you may feel that is enough or not. I have to say and keep repeating to myself (by refraining from certain reactions) and to everyone else that I am deeply sorry about the attitude that I represented onto myself, someone who’s calm and quiet IRL, shouldn’t had to happen but my feelings trumped my mind over something that I was excited about, seeing it happening for the first time in ages, Crash Bandicoot, of course.
This, however, did not excuse what happened, you may say “Oh, but people did it worse than you” or “you are the most single worst person I have ever talked to on Twitter, blocked/unfollowed/muted”, yes, I can see all of these and I am fully aware. I had some legitimate cases where I truly screwed it up because I couldn’t express my grudge against someone’s point or attitude towards others regarding what I love, I knew that bagging on someone popular on YouTube for some of his points that I personally felt were invalid could get him to respond, to make a conversation, but my way of doing it made it worse because I’m such a reactionary person that I felt extreme guilt after the responses from people who I have not even met or talked to.
The same goes for those people who I felt were bagging on details that I felt were not warranted to be that negative on, apologies for that and I’m sorry about it. I felt the need to post about it somewhere else on a Discord channel that I frequent where a smaller amount of people could understand my frustration, rather than doing it on Twitter, unbelievably immature, isn’t it?
So, instead of me gut-reacting every time on Twitter, mostly addressing issues or people trash-talking about the thing I like, I will be reducing myself from those usually of the ballistic reactions that I had previously to justify my position or grudge. I have been recently trying to be more respectful to those that I’m unfamiliar of, although you may had seen my grudge about someone who I know in the community, there will be less of that because of the way these things usually turn out in my case.
Last, but not least, I know that I have been extremely unreactive and unproductive about 3WIREL’s mismanagement, I am still trying to find a new design and also planning out some posts that I want to talk about, in order to suit my daily routine.
In the end, I don’t want to directly call out people, because that’s not professional or appropriate, I just hope, to whom it may concern, that you are aware of this mistake and that you understand that I am sorry about it, trying to change that and that I am not myself if it wasn’t for me to make this post, even if it’s this late, I feel. If you want to still ask or talk to me about some things that I missed or feel that this was not enough about how to remedy that, don’t feel hesitant to answer them.